Are there noises that people make that irritate you to no end? Or are you one of the few that could be surrounded by a group of slurping, sucking, clacking, sighing, or munching people and not be bothered in the least by it?

I can take all of these sounds in small doses, but if it’s particularly irritating or goes on and on, well that person is taking their life in their own hands. I haven’t injured anyone yet but I sure came close today!

As I said I can take some of this over a short period of time. My husband is a fidgeted. I’m getting used to the odd things he does and the odd sounds that he makes or creates. For example:

• We have leather couches. My husband loves cold things. leather couches are cold. My hubby will lie on the couch watching T.V. and rub his arm back and forth over the couch. Sometimes he does this with his legs. Occasionally arms and legs at the same time. It sort of looks like he’s having a strange kind of seizure. I’ll tolerate it for a while but eventually the shussshing noise of his skin rubbing the leather, or the creaking noises of the couch get to me and I’ll ask him to stop. When he wears the leather off these babies we are not getting leather again. Uh uhuh.
• He likes to tap his nails on the steering wheel in time to the music when he drives. Click click click;
• If he’s watching T.V. or reading while eating he sometimes gets distracted and eats with his mouth open gloriously enhancing the sounds of mastication.
• He sometimes hums when he chews.
• He occasionally slurps his drink.
• He moves his fingers as if he’s playing guitar if there is music on T.V., and or he wiggles his feet around to music while watching a program. Distracting if he really gets going.
• Oh, and when he clears his throat he’s started to do it much more vocally. This one scares me because his dad also clears his throat vocally. So loudly in fact that a whole room will vibrate, and he does this frequently, perhaps every 5 to 10 minutes. If hubby starts getting louder when he clears his throat it will drive me nuts!

Now this post is NOT about my husband, even though I’ve listed a few of his either bad or odd habits. I tolerate these habits fairly well for the most part. In fact, I find some of them amusing if they are momentary. We all have some irritating habits or sounds that we make. I’m sure we do. I’m not really sure what my irritating sounds are, but I’m human, and I must have some. You see, my husband is one of those rare people that can tolerate just about anything, so I can’t count on him to let me know that something I do is irritating. I could have a habit of making the most irritating sounds and he wouldn’t tell me. Aren’t I lucky?

No this post is about a lady I encountered Monday afternoon while I waited for 25 minutes in a line to drop off some important papers. My hubby and I were standing in line minding our own business when I heard some rustling behind me. I didn’t think much of it until I started hearing “Crunch, Crunch, CRUNCH” then a pause, then “Crunch, CRUNCH, Crunch … ”

Ok so someone behind me was eating some very crunchy chips. Maybe they were Doritos … they are fairly crunchy. I didn’t think the sounds would go on too long- after all a bag is only so big, but they went on for at least 10 minutes.

Ahhh the sound stopped. Now if only this line would move I could finish up here and then get some other things done and head home.

Behind me I hear “smUUUVvvvvvvvvv” “Stttutchhhhhhhhhh” Is she doing what I think she’s doing? Is she SUCKING HER TEETH? Yep she’s sucking her teeth. I’m starting to get irritated now. My jaw is hurting, I’m in public with my messed up face thanks to my accident, and someone has been making loud crunching noises behind me and must have been eating something that stuck in her teeth.

I glanced at my husband and moved my eyes back in the direction of the lady. My husband just nodded. He knew I was getting irritated. The sucking teeth noise went on and on for the duration of my remaining time in the line. I endured crunching noises for 10 minutes followed by extreme tooth sucking for 15 minutes.

I think my hubby was amused, me I was starting to vibrate with irritation. My limbs were shaking. I wanted to turn around and give the lady the evil eye but I’m usually very polite in public and I don’t like to show my irritation with people. Also I was afraid that if I did turn around my hands would have reached for her throat and that might have ended badly and ruined my day. I hate it when my day is ruined.

Why would she eat something that stuck in her teeth while in public, while in a line that she couldn’t leave in order to go brush her teeth or floss or pick at them in private like a normal person would? Why? Did she not realize how loud the sound of her tooth sucking was? Yes I know that that things get stuck in peoples teeth and sometimes they find themselves trying to suck the evil piece of debris from their teeth, but most people only do that for a minute at the most, NOT 15 minutes!

Her life was spared today, but if she does that in public again she might run into someone who is even more easily irritated than I, or perhaps someone with less control that I had today and she might make news headlines.

I can see it now:

“Woman Strangled in crowded grocery line up this Evening … The accused was heard to say as he was lead off by police “she wouldn’t stop, she just kept sucking her teeth, louder and louder. I had to make the sound stop. but … I can still hear it in my head! Oh make it stop, make it stop, please”. The accused is expected to plea temporary insanity.”