Tricia's Musings

Random Thoughts about life in general, living in the big city of Toronto



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I need a holiday

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LOL ok in light of what I just said below I think I’m definitely going to plan at least a weeks holiday in the near future. I really think I need a break.

Perhaps I’ll look into one of those Virgin Island yacht charters … well if I come into a lot of money maybe I will. I think it’d be too hot to go to a Caribbean island or another warm location at this time of year.

Perhaps I’ll just rent a cottage for a week in Northern Ontario. That’s more my cup of tea anyway. I haven’t been camping or canoeing in ages and I really miss doing that.

I grew up having a cottage and we went there pretty much every weekend throughout my childhood. I really miss not having a cottage to go to anymore. Hey, maybe what I should do is look into buy a cottage instead of just thinking about renting one. Yes I know cottage properties are pretty darn expensive, but this half city half country girl could sure use a place to retreat to every now and then.





Just checking in

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I’m sorry that I haven’t posted for a few days. That doesn’t happen very often. I guess, considering how frequently I normally post you could say my little break just balanced things out a bit.

I’ve been so ill. I was very sick for all of last week, but it got worse on Friday and to be honest I think today is the worst that I’ve felt in a long long time. I absolutely hate having Crohn’s disease.

I must have looked as bad as I felt yesterday because Chris actually told me that I looked bad. He never does that. It’s not just because he’s a nice husband. He is, but it’s because I seem to be one of those people that can practically be at deaths door and very few people will be able to tell just by looking at me just how bad I’m feeling.

This has been to my extreme disadvantage when seeing doctors or when I’ve been sick enough that I’ve had to go to the ER. The practice of medicine is both objective and subjective – you have to listen to what the patient is telling you, but you also have to listen to what your own eyes and observations are telling you. When you don’t look as sick as you are, you don’t always get the best care … well, at least up until all the blood work and other test results come in.

Anyway … I just wanted to check in and let you know I’m still here. I’ve got some posting that needs to be done, so you should see a few new articles on this site and some of the others that I run in the next few hours – including my Green Thumb Sunday posting.

Losing my memory

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Do you ever have those days when you can’t remember what you just did? I think I’m having one of those days … or well one of those moments.

My Crohn’s, as usual, is acting up again, and I’m in a lot of pain. A LOT of pain. One of the pain meds that I take I can take twice a day, every 12 hours. Well … I’ve been in pain all day, but it’s been worse since mid afternoon or so. I got caught up in my work though and forgot to go and take one of the pills. The last time I had taken one was at about 2 a.m.

I meant to take it earlier. Really I did.

So anyway, I just remembered and I walked into the kitchen to get one of the pills. I got distracted by my elderly neighbor in her yard hoeing the earth around her plants like she does three times a day. LOL

Then I went to the cupboard and I know I got out a Tylenol. I remember that. I’ve got a fever and I needed the Tylenol as well as a pain med. However, I think I took one of my mild short acting pain pills rather than my long lasting time released pain pills.

I can’t remember.

BTW it’s the pain that’s messing with my memory … not any other pain meds because I don’t have any other pain meds in my system. This will be the first that I’ve taken today … which is why I’m in so much pain.

I’m at least 90% sure that I didn’t open the small pill bottle and take out the long acting medicine. But … if I believe that and take one now and I’m wrong I’ll have two long acting pain pills in my system. It’s oxycontin so I don’t want to O.D. on it.

Short of gagging myself and bring up the pills I just took so I can discover what they were … what do I do?

Trust my vague memory that I did not take the pill I had wanted to take?

Or not take any chances and wait until 7 a.m. to take that pill again – 12 or more than 24 hours after the last one depending upon if I just took one or not?

The part of me that’s in pain says “take the pill, you didn’t take it.” and the nurse side of me says “don’t take a chance, wait.”

I’m dragging today

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I’m sorry that I haven’t yet managed to do my Green Thumb Sunday post. I’ve got so much work to do today that it’s not funny!

Plus, the Crohn’s has reared it’s nasty head so I’m trying to do my work with a massively high fever and abdominal pain that I probably should, but won’t, go to the hospital about. I won’t go because I know it’s the Crohn’s and there isn’t much they can do for me, but put me on more meds and maybe hydrate me a little bit.

I’m sick of doctors, hospitals, appointments and medical tests. I’m sick of the pain too and not being able to eat more than a mouthful of food at a time. It can take me upwards of two to three hours to eat dinner sometimes. I take a few bits and then I have to take a break. By the time I’m about a half hour into a meal it’s getting pretty disgusting because the food is cold and uh often has a different texture than when it’s warm which turns me off the food even more, but you can only heat up a meal so many times before you destroy it that way too.

I think I’ll be lying down for about 24 hours once I’m done my work, and the Green Thumb Sunday post. I probably won’t be visiting any sites today, but if I feel better tomorrow I’ll visit some of my GTS and maybe Do follow people.

I hope my American friends are having a nice long weekend.

Off to see the doctor – again!

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Chris and I are off to the family doctor in a little while. Due to Chris’ work schedule we actually haven’t been able to get there since sometime in January! Our Doctor doesn’t work on Mondays and since Chris started his new job in December he always had Mondays off but he recently changed his schedule and now gets every second Monday off, and on odd weeks he gets Tuesdays off. So now we can see our family doc again.

This is a doctor that I had been seeing just about every two weeks for the last two years because I’ve been so sick so it feels weird to have had this long of a stretch between visits. It’s not like I ever really needed to see her that much since nothings been changing with my health. I’m still sick, still having fevers every day and still in pain. What can she do anyway other than keep referring me to other specialists and I’m already seeing the best in the city for my Crohn’s anyway.

I’m so tired of seeing doctors. I think I’ve been kind of glad to have had this break.

I guess it’s good timing for the visit this time round though since I’ve been feeling worse than normal lately.

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