Chris and I went shopping again yesterday. No, no big spending this time. This was only a boring trip to the pharmacy and grocery store.
Outside of the drugstore we watched two idiots in their respective vehicles go through the throws of road rage.
It seems that a van trying to get out of the parking lot decided to do so by driving on the left side of the entrance. This meant that anyone wanting to drive into the drugstore parking lot would have to wait, or drive onto the right side of the entrance in order to get in. Considering that it was a van that was on the wrong side of the entrance, I think anyone trying to drive around it would probably be foolish since they wouldn’t have been able to see if another vehicle was trying to get out, and therefore might have ended up in an accident.
I don’t know if the van had stopped at the mouth of the entrance or if a car was trying to get in at the same time as the van was trying to get out on the wrong side. By the time we came along the two vehicles were head to head, or rather grill to grill. The car half on the street and half on the side walk. The van half in the parking lot, half on the sidewalk.
This would have been so much easier to write if I’d taken a picture! Duh! I didn’t though ’cause you never know what a person undergoing road rage will do.
Both drivers were screaming at the other to move. Chris and I stopped to watch the show as I got a coffee from the Tim Hortons window on the side of the drugstore. I was just waiting for some elderly or handicapped person to come along and find that they couldn’t use the sidewalk to get around the two idiots. Would the cars have finally moved for someone in need? Somehow I don’t think they would have.
After about five minutes we were bored. The idiots weren’t moving and we had other things to do. We got in our car and carefully pulled out of the lot. As we were driving out we saw three police officers walking towards the stand off. I guess someone that had walked by the idiots saw the cops as they pulled into a dinner up the street to get their coffee and or breakfast and asked them to intervene. Curious Chris decided to pull over to watch the action, however it wasn’t very interesting as both vehicles moved as soon as the police officers briefly spoke to each of them.
Are you a road rager? Or have you seen some interesting cases of Road rage? Leave me a comment about your experience.
On to the grocery store.
As I was deciding which kinds of fruit and veggies I wanted to purchase, my husband Chris went off to get some other items. He returned within minutes though and he looked uneasy. He said to me “Stay with me baby, that guy over there is giving me the creeps! He keeps eye humping me!” I’ll protect you babe, just stick with me.
I just about keeled over with laughter. Eye Humping? I’ve heard a lot of terms to describe being oogled, but eye humping is a new one to me. Did my husband just invent a new term? If he did I like it because it completely describes how it feels to be gazed upon by someone with lust in their eyes who you have absolutely no interest in. At least Chris knows what that feels like now.
I just asked Chris if he’d heard that term before and he told me that he got it from the Family guy’s Peter Griffin. Yeah, of course he did, that’s his favorite show.
So, when was the last time you got eye humped, and what did you do about it?
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Eye Humping! heheehee
I am only the victom of the kind of eye humping folks wish to have when they ask “do you have a webcam?”
Honestly the last time I was eyehumped was a few years back, and that was a tranny on Church Street. I was feeling pretty good about that. I figured they were tryin to figure out where I got the dress, and would they look good in it? So I guess I have fashion sense….
I had a road rage incident when a guy in a BMW had a testosterone moment. I was a driving instructor at the time and I had an adult student from another country(who already knew how to drive), in my car to learn the Canadian rules of the road.
There was a rough construction patch and there was a sign guy directing traffic at the pylons. I asked her to put her signal on early because the sign guy would need to see it, and have to direct us depending on the direction we were going. He needed us to wait a few min (we were first in line) before he could open up the lane where we were to go.
We got in our left lane and the BMW guy pulled up beside us and signalled to me to open my window.
He says to me,” What kind of teacher are you? You had that student put the signal on too early!”
I looked at him and said, “I know I put the big honkin sign on my roof to explain to you way ahead of time that teaching is going on in this car. I do that purposely as a courtesy to other drivers so they can make their way around us with plenty of time to spare. But this morning you didnt reciprocate the courtesy by putting up your big sign saying ‘Asshole is driving this car’ so we could have avoided you as well. Next time think courtesy and put up your damn sign!”
My student who was pissin mad at the guy (she is a lawyer) laughed so hard the tears were comin down her face after my retort.
Isn’t eye humping a great term for how it makes you feel when someone does it to you? I love the phrase.
But honestly it was hilarious when it came out of Chris’ mouth … you just had to see the look on his face. He was horrified that another guy was making him feel like a piece of meat.
Now Lynn – what do you mean you say “do you have a webcam?” Does that mean someones thinking you should put on a webshow so they can eye hump you from home? 😉 Great line you gave the irritated driver. LOL